The Unchained doG

I had to ask my Spirit to explain this to me like I’m a child because with all my obsession for Spiritual development, the only thing I’ve achieved is a lot of muddy water and a great collection of books on the subject.

So I’m writing it down because I need to see it in my words and not because I think it will help anyone. (It’s a GOOD thing my reach is so small)

I’m gonna put it out there for the other captives…

I’m waving at you and winking hello.

This morning I was startled awake by a good thought.

It was strange (and sad) to realize that a “good thought” out of nowhere had interrupted my regularly scheduled pattern of morning dread and confusion.

What was even stranger was it had no prompt at all. It was just there… and it was loud.

“I love you. I always have and I always will.”

Almost instantly it turned into a full visual dialog.

I’m kinda use to that trippy weird feeling, but it’s rare to experience something like this first thing in the morning before coffee and with such a profound lead up.

I was looking/feeling an image of a small dog chained to a tree with an empty bowl just out of its reach. At first I was appalled by it and I almost stopped the process right there.

I mean this started off so pleasant! How the hell (and why) did it go here!?

Clear as a blue spotless day, I heard “hang on a second, I’m trying to show you something and it’s important.”

“Fine… I said to myself… I got nothing else to do, I’ll shut up and just watch… good thing you lead with I love you because THIS ain’t lookin so good.”

Instantly I could feel myself wanting to help the little dog. I was overwhelmed with pity and sadness but all I could do was watch the scene. This small animal just sat at the base of the tree on a heavy chain which seemed to be bigger than it was. The bowl was dirty and empty and just out of reach like some horrible torment, but there was this crazy feeling of love and excitement poring off the small dog as soon as our eyes met.

Its tail began wagging so hard that its whole body got in on the movement.

I bent down and scooped it up in my arms. The little thing started licking my face and burrowing its head into my hands.

Then a feeling hit me like a bomb. I swear I would have sat straight up in bed if my body could have moved.

I was hearing the feeling.

I was actually hearing AND feeling and there was no difference between the two.

I told my mind not to give it definition. Or I thought it was my mind.

It wasn’t. I could feel that too.

Another image started and the little dog was off the chain and not little anymore. “She” was in a sitting position at my side, ears up and calmly excited to go for a walk. We both were. And she was huge. Like really, really big.

There was a door (of course there was a door) and it was open.

Outside were hundreds, if not thousands, of people with little chained dogs.

None of them even noticed the dogs. They were milling about, busy with doing things. Important things, dangerous things and urgent things.

It was quite an intense feeling for me to watch.

I was washed with emotions. Sad, angry, nervous. I could hardly handle it.

We both were still, starring at the mass of people and dogs and trees. She never stood up to move and neither did I move, but I knew… I mean I truly understood for the first time in my life.

All the little chained dogs were the Spirits of the people. They were not some “supernatural” otherworldly things.. they were THEIR spirits.

Their life force.

Their intuition.

Their creativity.

Their empathy and knowing.

Their unique personality.

Each one looked completely different. Like the people did. Each one had its own uniqueness sitting calmly at the base of trees. Watching… waiting… no movement. But there was love. And beauty, and patience, and a gentleness I could never imagine or describe. I can only use the word “love” here because I’m not sure I have the intelligence to describe it. I’m still such a child and I have much to learn.

But one thing’s for sure…

I wanted to cry out and tell them to LOOK… I wanted to make them see they could play and create and not be so alone! I was overwhelmed with wanting to help but it wasn’t about them. The whole scene was for me to experience and to become acquainted with, because my Spirit knows. I do not.

Not yet anyway.

There is so much more to possibly write. It’s still unraveling. Maybe one day..

But the feeling of love in the midst of such startling imagery is what’s important to me. I understand a few things now. The “why”, the testing, the sadness, even the joy and beauty. I get some of it but I am so small and underdeveloped… If I tried to write more I feel like I would just embarrass that sweet essential intelligence who waited for so long to be seen, I’d definitely mess it up with a bunch of wordy words.

For right now, I think I’ll go paint something and see if she likes it.